Lornamyrrh Bandian
From Paquito (Jay) 😔
He is a big part of me, yes. But the truth is, I was named after my father, and it is my pride to carry his name and legacy as his son. He is not just a part of me—we are one, and I will continue this legacy.
I have changed in ways he may not have imagined, through the years of healing myself alone. I learned to carry a calmer, nicer spirit. It was never easy to achieve my goals, but I found myself growing stronger through fear and faith. I was so blessed to be your son. I was so blessed to know you and to understand your principles.
I am sorry that I didn’t always make you satisfied or proud of me. But now that you may rest in peace, I will carry your name with honor. I find myself becoming a brave warrior, and God is gracious. Jheng Junior—I will continue the legacy and walk in your jeans. I will make sure you will be proud of me.
We may not have been blessed with money, but you taught me something greater: how to establish myself, respect myself, so I can respect others. His words became my strength and shield when I was in my 30s.
I once told him I had a problem. I told him I had fear.
“Ano un? Aba kung kailan ka tumanda saka ka nagsasabi sakin ng mga takot mo.”
“Naliligaw ka, baliktarin mo damit mo at baka sakalı makita mo at maintindihan mo yan.”
All I could say was, “Dad, I don’t understand.”
As I went through my life and survived ten years on the ship, I gained discipline and pride. Then I failed. The only words he gave me were: wag mo kalabanin sarili mo at hanapin mo kung Ano Ang tama para sa sarili mo at magtiwala ka sa sarili mo.
I was very damaged at that time, but he let me—wanted me—to heal myself on my own.
Dad, my father, my friend, my mentor—I am nothing but you. I am nothing without you. Your principles are what molded my life and my goals.
Django, a brave man with powerful words. When I was young, he always reminded me, “Jay, be a man of your word.” I learned discipline, integrity, and accountability. I made mistakes, but I accepted them and continued learning, as you taught me, dad.
I love you, Dad.
